If you can't say anything nice
Don't say anything at all....

Something like that anyway.

This day I am....

.....feeling fall in the air, when I am not quite ready to let go of summer
.....wondering how a bee goes about dying hanging from the inside of a flower
.....fighting yet another sickness in the house, and feeling oh so tired about this current trend
.....staring at this box of peaches, and that bag of beans, and that bushel of apples and praying for the energy to come soon so they get properly preserved
.....loving that my cold room shelves, in spite of it all, are slowly filling with jars of summers harvest
....attempting homemade sauerkraut for the first time
....surprised at how much I enjoyed the noise and grit of the monster truck show (so LOUD!)
.....wowed by our giant sunflowers
.....enjoying my flowers and my boys and all the other good things in my life
.....taking a few photos to share...

Sunday Therapy

Time to lighten up I think.

Saturday Morning Therapy

The day dawns early in this house
even when there is no good reason to
except that the sun is shining
and the dog needs to pee

Loneliness seeps into these moments
so that the last ten dollars in my wallet
seems best spent on breakfast at the diner

Where tables full of men
fill the room (and my heart) with their voices
Stories of this years crops
Yesterday's golf game
Rising taxes and idiot politicians
Furnaces that needed to be fixed in the middle of the night
Today's rodeo

There is no talk of unpaid bills
cheating wives
Explaining divorce to small boys
dividing lives and kitchen utensils
Pages of to do lists
tears washing the pillow case at night

There are days when I might cringe at the lack of depth in the talk
yearn to know the real stories behind the creases around their eyes
the unspoken moments they carry in the grey of their hair

But not today
Today I need this coffee that I did not have to make
these conversations I don't have to carry
For just one hour
lost in the voices of strangers
I can be free

Random Meanderings

Why can I not put the words together

to explain that I was lost

and didn't know it

That I was never anywhere but here

I just forgot

That there is a centre to my body

that I can only feel when my feet are off the ground

How do I say that I wasn't lying when I wrote that box full of forever's

but that today the photo of my beliefs looks different

I didn't know that life is a collection of various positions

I so badly wish for a million different words for love

So I could tell each of you how much I do, and exactly how

And that maybe those "forevers" would make sense after all

Today

I found my centre here

and I loved in cartwheels

black coffee and breakfast

sticky hands and cherry kisses